Project: Yard

*I hate blogger and it's spacing issues. I really don't choose to have one inch spaces between paragraphs. I really don't. But blogger thinks I do. I give up. Enjoy the spaciousness.

Let me start off by saying I love a nice yard. Love love love it.

Let me also say that my yard is not a nice yard. It's just not. I need to say right up front that I'm not talking about the lawn. Zack takes care of the lawn and it looks just fine. I'm talking about the flower beds. Or, in my case, dirt beds with the occasional plant that hasn't died yet.

Since moving into our house 7 1/2 years ago I have only managed to create two flower beds that actually look decent. Here's one of them:

I love this little area. I know it only really looks good part of the year since most of these plants die down to nothing, but I really like it. Not only does it look nice, but all of the plants come back every year. I don't have to plant anything! They just keep coming back! I especially like it when the lilies in the front bloom bright red. (There is that spot in the left-hand corner that needs something, but other than that, it's FANtastic.) I also have a stretch in the back yard planted with a row of rose bushes. I like that area, too.

But I'm struggling with the other flower beds. I really am. It's a shame that they are the biggest and one of them is the main one in the front yard. It looks pretty crappy despite that fact that over the years we've planted numerous bushes and my mom, the talented Gardener that she is, even tried to help me with it. It just doesn't look good.

I am happy to say, though, that his year it is weed-free and it's been weed-free for a month! That's because I've implemented a genius plan for doing yard work. Here it is: Weed every week. Brilliant, right? And here's the kicker. It actually WORKS! I've been following this plan for a month now and my yard is weed free! It could be weed free for the entire summer if I just follow my super plan. Weed-free is great but, sadly, it still doesn't make my yard look good. It just keeps it from looking trashy.

My problem is I haven't figured out what I want my flower beds to look like. So instead of maintaining a beautiful space, I'm just doing weed control year after year for some sad looking patches of dirt.

This year, however, I think I've figured out what to do with THIS tasty spot in the backyard:

Nice, huh? Two pitiful plants, a maple tree (the third one we've planted there because they all keep dieing) and a hearty aspen.

Let me unfold to you my master plan for this space.

First I'll start off by planting some more flowers and bushes:

Big bushes up against the fence, sunflowers with semi-tall purply flowers in front of them, a butterfly bush (that isn't dead), another peony bush, and a few assorted flower bushes next to it. Then I'll make it look nice by adding some good dirt. Ooooo, diiiirt!
Then I'll add some stepping stones and a few more flowers.

It's starting to look good, huh? Well, wait until you see the final touch!A bench! Benches make everything better.

Then, someday when the maple tree grows big and tall (and doesn't die) I can sit under the bench and enjoy nature. That's the plan. Problem is now that we have kids (and adoption fees) I can't justify spending the money it would take to actually implement the plan. But I consider it a great step that I've finally figured out what to do in the backyard corner. And hey, it only took 7 years!

And now we come to the final flower bed. The one that everyone sees when they drive past the house:

The only reason there are actually green things growing in it right now is because they are things that don't really need care to grow: daffodils and daisies. The aspen tree looks like it might actually survive this year (it's the third of it's kind) and the lilac bush and Rose of Sharon bush must like where they are because they've been there for 7 years.

I honestly don't know what to do with this space. Any ideas? Suggestions? What can I plant that will actually look good year round? What do you think I should do? So far, all I've come up with is this:

And then this guy can figure out what to do.

Sometimes I Just Crave a Big Ol' Peesha Banana Smash Pie

This is Zack's recipe for Banana Smash Pie. It's pretty straightforward seeing as most of the ingredients are "banana smash" with just a touch of fdsafdsa. It only takes about 3 1/2 hours to make and goes great with steak, potato, beans and corn. At only 567 calories a serving it's a meal in itself!

This is my new template for what I like to call our "dinner recipes". My intention is to make a recipe for all the dinners we have at our house. The idea is that one of us (or one of our future kids) will be able to pick a dinner, know what they need in order to make it and have some ideas for sides to go with it. My goal is to someday have my kids plan, shop for and cook all the meals for Zack and I.






(Now that you've had a chance to stop laughing....)
The real plan is for me to be able to plan, shop for and cook our meals without feeling like I've pulled out my teeth one by one. All I'll have to do to plan a menu for the week is choose from a variety of Evans Approved Meals. These meals aren't going to be rocket science. For instance, one of them is "BLT's" and the ingredients are, you guessed it,: bacon, lettuce, tomato, bread, and mayo. Sides might include potato chips and cottage cheese, broccoli, carrots or even corn!

Why do I need this? I don't know, but I do. And Zack was wonderful enough to create a cool template in Excel where all I have to do is plug in words and it creates that nice format you see in his "example recipe" for Banana Smash Pie! Thanks, Zack!

Two posts on the same subject. Post One: Something Blew Up In My Kitchen

I don't know. I got tired of using cupboards. They're so confining. Why does everything have to be hidden? Why can't I have everything out in the open where I can see it? Besides, counterspace is SO overrated. Am I right? Now that everything's out in the open, who knew I had 16 vases and a glass pitcher? (Who uses a glass pitcher anyway? Isn't that for the Kool-Aid guy?)

I guess this isn't the best way to clean the cupboards, especially since it's going to take us a week to put everything back because we're anal and we want to make sure every space in our kitchen is OPTIMIZED! For instance, glass vases that you never use take up a lot of room. Mugs that you only use occasionally take up a lot of room. Items you do want to use (such as that awesome Bosch that your mom got you for Christmas SEVEN years ago that is currently picking up dust on your pantry floor, and that George Foreman grill that you have used only once because you forgot you had it. ...I mean, come on, the rice cooker you got from your wedding is a gift from heaven, the GF grill has got to be half as good, at least) should be placed in an easy-to-reach area. I've also discovered a few other useful tips: You should make sure you have a complete set of measuring cups and spoons, not several sets of mismatched ones. If you don't drink champagne or wine, you probably don't need a cork screw. For people who rarely eat potatoes, three potato peelers probably aren't necessary. Perhaps the dog treats, leashes, heartguard pills, and medicine shouldn't be thrown into a pile on top of the barbecueing tools. And the spices, don't even get me started about the spices. The cute spice rack you got from your wedding? You know, the one where you only use 3 spices from it while the ones you actually use are in the cupboard and hard to see? Maybe you ought to reconsider how that works...

Two posts on the same subject. Post Two: A Declaration of War

We blew up our cabinets today in a tactical maneuver to get rid of the tiny brown beetles. So far, we've sent a mighty blow to their forces by destroying their homeland. But their numbers are many and they are not easily rid of. The war continues....

The REAL Tragedy of Puppyland

Many of you (okay, maybe just D'Nell) have been anxiously awaiting the blogging debut of "Tragedy in Puppyland". Alas, I have bad news. Although I have the said movie on my computer, I cannot find a way to post it on my blog. It's too long for dropshots (over 2 minutes!) and it's too big for youtube. (It's freakin' 811 MB!!!) If anyone has any ideas on how to post it, I'm more than anxious to hear them.

On a happier note, at least I have the movie on my computer! I also have other choice selections such as, "Monkey Band" (my personal favorite), "Evil Hannah", "The Silence of the Barbies", and "MoonBathers" (another classic).

A few lesser known films such as "AlphaWars", "Pakistani Hair Salon" and "The Fire Problem" are also on my computer. However, their content is so painful that I don't dare let anyone view them. If, I mean, WHEN I become more Adobe Premier savvy I might take little bits out of those films so that those of you who are in them can view your best selves (Heather, Janan, Dan, RaeAnn...).

This is also a call to those of you who might know the whereabouts of "Bermuda Flight 911" and "Cleetus vs. The Asteroid". Where are they? I haven't yet searched my massive VHS graveyard, so they could be in there.

As soon as I get ahold of all of these movies, I will put them on a DVD and sell it to the WORLD!

Because I know many of you miss all these treasured home movies, I will leave you with a few quotes.

Which quote goes with which movie? A treat for whoever gets the most correct! An extra treat if you can name who says each quote.

1. "I'm so lonesome! I girl named "Princess" shouldn't be lonesome. I need a puppy, or a prince...but a puppy would be nice!"

2. "We found the barbies!!!! ...but everyone died!"

3. "We'll give that cheese-eatin' surrender monkey trainer a run for his money!"

4. "Ya betta believe he's a bum-muncha!"

5. "Como?"

6. "The moral of the story is- Don't be a spankin' monkey."

7. "Ah ha ha! You are now in the dungeon. And soon, after two weeks, my GUN will take over the WORLD! Wah ha ha!"

Prophets in HD!

We are in the process of finishing a room in our basement. We fondly call it "the family room downstairs." I know. Very original. The room is currently all enclosed (framed or cement walls) and has a newly installed fireplace. The next step is installing the HVAC, so I thought. My loving, hard-working, and ever industrious husband convinced me that the real next step was to buy the flat-screen TV that we plan to install down there once the basement is finished. He had some good reasons for this. The first of which was, "I want to have the TV before I run the electrical so I'll know where to run the wires and how I want to mount the TV." Sure. It made sense to me. That's how we came to buy the TV at the end of February. When it came, we set it up in our "great room" and oooo-ed and aahhh-ed at the crystal-clear HD picture we got using our regular old, ancient, analog antanae. (Take THAT satellite TV!)

It wasn't until a week later when Zack was talking about March Madness and I said the words "Hey, the basketball games will be really cool to watch on the new TV!", that I realized his double-motive for getting the TV what will most likely turn out to be one year earlier than we needed it.

Getting a larger, MUCH more expensive, TV than we've ever had in our entire lives has made me a bit nervous. Are we just like everyone else? So much as we try to deny it, is entertainment really the most important thing in our life? We tried to console ourselves by saysing, "Conference is going to look AWEsome on this TV!" (Then we'd high-five and body slam each other. ) Well, we watched Conference on the new TV today and I have to say, Conference looks AWEsome on this TV. Like we're rubbing shoulders with the prophets. Expensive technology justified!

"It's like he's right in our living room, only just a little tinier!"

Zack and Prophet Hinckley sharing a moment.