I have a few theories on 6 and 7 year olds. I'll share one with you now and then let you ponder with me a new theory.
My theory is this: Six and seven year olds eat pencils. And crayons.
How else does a freshly sharpened bin of 24 pencils dwindle down to a 5 or 6 half chewed-on pile of pencil refuse in under 3 days? It's simple. They eat the fresh ones and leave the half-eaten old ones for me to find. They do it to establish power and control. They are the wild beasts of the jungle and I am the unwitting school marm.
"Good morning my precious little angels! Are we ready to learn today?"
"ME NO LIKE LEARN. ME EAT PENCIL."
I've had this theory for some time. It explains why my pencils and crayons disappear, it explains bite marks on said items, and it explains why they're finished with lunch 2 minutes after we enter the lunchroom. They're NOT hungry anymore.
Now for today's unsettling theory. The newly budding theory is this: 6 and 7 year olds hurt themselves on PURPOSE sometimes.
Today, while we were cleaning up after math (math can be very messy), one of my boys came and told me that "Bill's" (names have been changed to protect the innocent) lip was bleeding. When I came over to see what the deal was, I saw that Bill's lip was indeed bleeding. I asked him what happened and he said "I punched myself." Unlike a few other students in my class, Bill isn't known for lying. If he said he punched himself in the face, I have no choice but to believe that he in fact PUNCHED himself in the face. Bill also isn't "wild", "distrubed", "ADHD" or any of those other titles that would have merited some sort of explanation for PUNCHING himself in the face.
Boys? Do you really hurt yourselves just for fun? And sometimes, when you are a man, do you wear stretchy pants in your room...for fun?
11 years ago
3 comments:
pencils give children the necessary fiber in their diet...everyone knows that silly!
My two year old eats crayons. He ate some today infact. I didn't realize that this was a problem we are going to have to deal with for many more years to come. Thanks for the heads up, I'll make sure to keep him away from my pencils.
I've witnessed the consumption of many a writing utensil. It's a necessary developmental process. As is voluntary physical assault on one's own person. I believe it is unique to the male of the species, except in isolated cases.
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